Apparently, we’re no longer desirable after 40. This is according to one in three Gen Zers, who shared their thoughts on ageing in a new study by Edubirdie.
The study also reveals that one in 11 Gen Z-ers think we stop having sex post 40. You can imagine their faces contorted in disgust as they contemplate all that wrinkled flesh and cringeworthy love chat. I still remember the deep commiserations dished out at school if anyone walked in on their parents ‘doing it.’
However, as someone who found their sexual mojo post-40, I want to tell Gen Z they are wrong. Lots of us are ‘doing it’ and with age comes more, and often better, sex.
For me, my sexual awakening came post-divorce. Knowing I was (hopefully) going to experience sex with someone new, I forced myself to get over the cringe of discussing it. I read about it, talked to friends and to partners. I wanted to get rid of the shame and embarrassment I’d carried around it. And to enjoy it! And now I do.
The Gen Z debate
That said, you’ll hear no gasps of horror from me on learning that Gen Z disagrees. I find absolutely nothing surprising in this information at all.
Gen Z are between 13 and 28 and back when I was that age, I would have considered someone in their fifth decade positively ancient. I thought they were residing in God’s waiting room, crocheting their shroud.
In my late teens, I thought 25 was decrepit and any man that age who tried to chat me up was physically repulsive. The boys at university (18-21) went to a ‘grab a granny’ night (their words) on a Thursday where the women were predominantly sub-30.
It didn’t occur to them that for a woman of 27 to have babies, who’ve then in turn had babies, would pretty much defy the laws of biology and be considered extreme even in the most conservative states of Utah.
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I think this aversion to anyone older is hard-wired into young brains to keep them away from sexual predators.
Sex post-40
Though Gen Z think sex is off the table after 40, I must reiterate that physical intimacy is often better at this age.
When you are young, self-doubt about your inexperience can creep in. Or how your body looks. So hung up on being hairy or pale, or not super model perfect, that the entire experience is fraught with anxiety. Now I give less of a stuff about what I look like. I think more about my pleasure than I do about whether my bum looks awful.
When you are older, you give less of a stuff. Or I do anyway. And I have real-life friendships with women who are having great sex in their 60s and 70s, so I don’t see why I won’t be enjoying ‘it’ for decades to come.
Of course, I wouldn’t have thought that at 19 at all. Plus ça change, plus c’est la même chose. Gen Z, ask Chat CPT to translate that…
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