Carmen Electra shares the dos and don’ts of dating older women

The dating scene can be rough, and sometimes you need to take a little advice. While men pursuing younger women is nothing new, there does seem to be a wave of younger men in their “cougar era.” Whether it’s a 5-, 10-, or 15-year difference, trying to lock down an older woman usually takes a little more effort than sending a “wyd” text, which is why Carmen Electra is here to help.

Electra broke the internet this week when she stepped in as Playboy Advisor, 30 years after she first appeared in the iconic magazine in May 1996. She answered questions about love and dating, sharing a helpful piece of advice for a man named Alan who asked, “Other than reply to texts in a timely manner, what can I do to woo middle-aged women?”

While Electra agreed that “texting or calling appropriately” is appreciated, she explained, it’s also about place, time, and the correct etiquette. She said one thing you need to make sure you never do is call her and say, “‘Hey, come meet me at a bar right now,'” when it’s midnight. “That’s a huge no-no. A woman likes to get ready, and she needs to make plans,” she said. 

Instead, Electra says you should call her early in the day and say, “Hey, let’s go out tonight. I want to take you out. I’ll be there to pick you up.”

“Something like that sounds a lot better than ‘Hey, meet me at the bar,'” she said, adding, “you know? No, it’s not happening.”

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That piece of advice is something that can go across the board when it comes to dating. Asking to meet at a bar when it’s late makes it feel like you just want to drink and hook up. 

There are also a lot of women who want to feel some level of courtship, so offering to pick them up or sending an Uber – considering they feel safe with you knowing their address – can go a long way. 

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In the world of nonchalance, if you are seriously looking for love, you’re going to have to put in some genuine effort and not be avoidant just because you’re scared of getting your heart broken. 

But not only guys need to be doing the pursuing, and sometimes they just don’t get the hint. One woman, trying to meet people in real life, told Electra she’ll make eye contact with guys, but nothing works. “Should I make the first move myself, or just take it as a sign?” she asked. 

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Electra called herself “old-fashioned,” and while she prefers making the first move, she said she sends some hints, like doing “a little walk. “Sway the hips a little bit, you know, bat my eyelashes a little like a butterfly, and keep on walking,” she said. “If they are really interested in you, they’ll talk to you or slip you their number.”